And reuniting with myself.
The first of the many, hopefully. My second time; Tsadiktus’ first… The last time I went here at Seven Sisters Country Park, I was alone and it was springtime. This time, we went during winter’s last hurrah; but thankfully, we were blessed with a sun-shiny Saturday.
The fields were green, despite the winter’s wrath—but the green was a little less pale (and somewhat lifeless) than during spring. Somehow, Tsadiktus still imagined himself to be at Heidi’s (that cartoon shown on TV during the 90’s) hacienda, and started chasing the flock of sheep—which scared them away, eventually!
We didn’t take the beach trail, instead we trudged along the famous rolling hills—the same trail that I passed along last year.
And thoughts came rushing in my head while we hiked–same old trail, same old feeling of aloneness. I hate that sudden melancholic feeling where, although I’m hiking with someone, something seemed to be still missing—and I barely have an idea what that is.
To shrug the negative vibes off, I tried searching for the big smiley that I saw lying on one of the valleys last year. It wasn’t there anymore, so I managed to draw one myself. And I thought, “whatever that is, always put on a happy face”. End of (the brief but melodramatic) story. Excuse my bipolarity.
And we wandered around for hours to reach the lighthouse—walking and sitting on the edge, taking photos, enjoying the rare sunshine, throwing our stress off the cliffs, and yeah forgetting about the need to take lunch–
…and until Tsadiktus experienced a sunset after weeks of gloominess in the UK.
It was a long but relaxing hike–and not to forget, thought-provoking. It made me realize quite a few things–like we are as happy as we make up our minds to be and that happiness must really come from within and not from anyone else. Cliche realizations, but just speaking for myself, I guess I should always be reminded by such kind of thoughts. I don’t know what went running inside Tsadiktus‘ mind that time, but I hope they were all good thoughts. :)
It’s about how you’re like a lighthouse, always searching far into the distance. But the thing you’re looking for is usually close to you and always has been. That’s why you have to look within yourself to find answers instead of searching beyond. –Susane Colasanti
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